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09 oktober 2011

Introduction

I am 25 yrs old and just had my first baby, a boy, on April 22, 2011.
I've struggled with my weight since I was in middle school. My mom was always either dieting hard core or completely off the wagon. She was obese and latched on to every fad diet that came along.
My parents struggled to provide for their 3 kids (I am the oldest) and often had to decide between paying the bills and putting food on the table. My dad worked to support us and my mom went to school at night and slept during the day. So we were often left alone to feed ourselves after school which meant scrounging for change to buy chips and candy from the liquor store. With my parents busy schedule and tight budget meant that we would eat fast food several times a week and by the time i was 12 I was over weight. All the back and forth dieting and over eating contributed to my unhealthy relationship with food. I didn't know what it was to eat healthy and didn't think much about what I was eating or that it was making me fat.
I don't blame my mom for my problems. I know she only did her best. When I was little, I thought she was perfect and now that I'm older I can see her as a person with her own problems and flaws like anyone else.
All the changes of early adolescents are hard enough without getting fatter and fatter every year along the way. And kids at that age can be cruel. Needless to say, my self esteem was very low when I graduated middle school.

At the same time I was graduating 8th grade, my mom was starting a new job as a nurse and my family suddenly wasn't hurting for money like we used to. We took our wealth to a small town at the edge of Ventura county where homes were a little cheaper.

The kids here were very different. It was my freshman year of high school and I was lonely, fat and awkward. The only people who would eventually accept me were other misfits. We cut class and experimented with drugs that escalated until I was expelled. Then I was sent to continuation school. I finally felt accepted. Everyone there had problems like me. We were free to come and go as we pleased, and smoke cigarettes in the open. We got high in our cars in front of the school and went to class totally blitzed. I was developing a speed habit, and hardly ever ate. But I was still fat. I was also nurturing an increasingly destructive relationship with my boyfriend.

When I graduated, I managed to stop taking drugs, for the most part except that I was a heavy pot smoker. I considered myself clean. I had a full time job, lived on my own and was a productive member of society.

When I reached my late teens I had finally had enough. I was 250 pounds and I was disgusted with myself. I started exercising obsessively and doing some extreme things to lose weight. Maybe it was a transfer addiction. As the weight melted off my boyfriend became more and more jealous and possessive of me. After 2 years of dealing with this I finally kicked him out and met the wonderful man I am with today. For the first time in my life I felt good about myself and I was so happy and in love.
During the course of our relationship we both gradually put on weight. I was still restricting my calories and doing some unhealthy behaviors. My weight fluctuated but I managed to put on 40 pounds.

Then I got pregnant. Which was wonderful! We were scared but excited. When I started eating like a normal person again the weight game on fast! I gained 65 pounds during my pregnancy weighing 255 pounds when I was admitted to the hospital.
The story of Julian's birth could fill up a few more pages on its own, but I'll tell you this- I was in labor for 54 hours and in the end I had a c-section. There he was. My beautiful baby boy. All 9 lbs 2 oz. of him. All we could do was look at each other and cry tears of joy that he was finally with us.
Recovery wasn't easy but I was determined to get up and around every day and I think that helped. 6 weeks later I was cleared for exercise again and I weighed in at 244 pounds. I was so ashamed. All the weight I had struggled to keep off was back.
This time I'm doing it right. It's definitely a hard road what with my husband and new baby demanding a lot of attention. Working a full time job and trying to keep up with the demands of a new family. Isn't that the challenge that so many if us face?
I'm going to learn as much as I can about health and fitness and do my best to put it into practice. I'm going to make little changes every week.

I'm going to live the lifestyle of a sexy wife and a good role model for my children. I'm going to be positive example for my sisters and my mom who still struggles with her weight despite taking the most drastic step I can think of and getting half of her stomach removed.
I will live the life style of a healthy and fit person in order to become a healthy and fit person. I believe that whether I listen to thin Amber more often or I listen to fat Amber more often I will eventually become her.

Reactie Toevoegen

09 oktober 2011

Gewicht:	Tot nu toe verloren:	Nog te gaan:	Dieet gevolgd:
107,7 kg	0,3 kg	27,4 kg	Redelijk Goed

Reactie Toevoegen Gewichtsafname van 0,8 kg per week

07 oktober 2011

Gewicht:	Tot nu toe verloren:	Nog te gaan:	Dieet gevolgd:
108,0 kg	0,1 kg	27,7 kg	Redelijk Goed

Reactie Toevoegen Gewichtsafname van 2,1 kg per week

07 oktober 2011

Gewicht:	Tot nu toe verloren:	Nog te gaan:	Dieet gevolgd:
108,0 kg	1,8 kg	35,4 kg	Redelijk Goed

Reactie Toevoegen Gewichtsafname van 2,1 kg per week

01 oktober 2011

Gewicht:	Tot nu toe verloren:	Nog te gaan:	Dieet gevolgd:
109,8 kg	0 kg	29,5 kg	Redelijk Goed

Reactie Toevoegen gewichtsbehoud

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